My therapist and I have talked about validation and how to handle it. While I think relying on other's opinions too much about self worth is not healthy, I realize after I transitioned I have been seeking more validation because I lacked confidence in my beauty and femininity.
I have recently been on several dates with a guy and he has told me I'm beautiful numerous times to which I reply "whatever what's wrong with you but my therapist says to say thank you." Today I realized that all the while I have been seeking the validation of my femininity and self worth, I deflect it when given to me as if I am not worthy of any praise or appreciation. But I am. I am worthy, I am beautiful, I am a woman and while I may be a trans woman, no one person can validate or deny my femininity and beauty except me.
It feels amazing to be told I'm beautiful and it's taken a long time to believe it. As the bird who has been too scared to fly, I use self validation of my beauty and femininity and spread my wings and take a chance that my family and friends will be the wind beneath my wings and help me soar high into the sky as the beautiful woman I am.
Jessica Ilene
Beautiful woman and beautifully written. Maybe it is time to read, "The Little Bird Who was Afraid to Fly' again. Let go of old ideas and enjoy the limelight and soar on those beautiful new wings. It is always nice to hear compliments. Take them and run with them - and take a glance in the mirror and admire who you are. Love you.
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